Monday, March 2, 2009

It's not my job

to question "why?"

"Why me?"

"Why has it been 12 months and we're not pregnant again?"

"Why can't we have another baby?"

In the fall, I had a pretty intense bout of the drearies. I don't think I was depressed in the actual, clinical sense of the word, but I definitely had a few weeks (okay, maybe more like 6-8 weeks) of some depression-like symptoms. After several weeks and much intense praying (myself and my Bible study girls), the Lord lifted those doubt-filled emotions and thoughts. He sustained me as I hurt for another baby.

I've found that in the past few weeks, those types of thoughts have returned. Yet, I know it's not my job to question the Lord. I'm in a time of tremendous faith growing. The Lord knows my deepest desires. He knows that in the darkest, quietest corners of my heart, I want another baby. It may or may not be in his life plan for me. I struggle with that. I tell him I struggle with that. He already knows...without my telling him.

Today, my heart has been broken. I had some quiet time this morning, so I was checking some blogs I read. As I checked on Kelly's precious Harper, I saw that she had some other blogs posted that needed prayer. As I read the needs of the other precious angels, I realized that as much as I want another baby, there are parents out there who are fighting for their babies' lives. My heart broke for these families whose needs are so great; yet their faith is so strong.

I want to share their websites with you so you can join me in prayer for them.

Gracie who at this very moment may already be in the arms of the Great Physician.

Makenna who was born with a rare chromosomal defect.

Jonah, an infant, already has a brother in heaven and has a rare skin disease. He is one of 8 in a million with this condition. The family and Jonah's doctors are eager for any ideas. Maybe you know something.

Owen was born with only 1/2 of a heart and is waiting for a heart transplant. He and his father have had the nasty stomach bug. His family would seriously use some prayer that his mother and sister are spared and that a heart comes available soon for him.

Brothers and sisters, the need is so great and I am so small. If we join our together and pray for these families, I know we can make a difference. The Lord has a perfect plan for each family, for each child, for each sibling. I can not possibly pretend to know or understand his plan or his time. But I know I can ask for comfort and peace for the families, wisdom for their doctors, compassion for their nurses and other health care providers.

Won't you please join me? Visit these families' sites and let them know you are praying for them. Post about them on your blogs. Let's get their names out there so we can lift them up during these painful times.

In Christ,


Christina said...

Natalie, I'm praying for comfort and healing...for you, and these other families in pain. Your faith is beautiful to see!

Arizaphale said...

What a wonderful heart you have Natalie. What amazing things people have to deal with and yet, as people keep telling me, the Lord never gives us more than we can deal with and will always give us the resources, in Grace and in loved ones, to help us deal with our problems. You are certainly a great resource and blessing for these families as we lift them up in their times of trial.