Thursday, August 5, 2010

A funny student story

For the sake of my own exhausted brain and hopefully your amusement, I'm going to share a hilarious story with you. As usual, I'll make it too long and it will probably bore you to death instead of make you giggle. Oh, well.

First, let me emphasis this by saying, "NOT ALL OF MY STUDENTS ARE THIS DEPRIVED. Many, MOST, of my students are from homes just like yours and mine. Normal, loving homes with a couple of kids, maybe a dog or a cat, active grandparents, etc."

Imagine Daniel...the 4th child in a family of 5. One sister, four boys. One mother, four fathers (not in the home...four fathers, five children...get the picture?). Many last names.

Daniel: You got a baby in there? (pointing to my stomach)

Me: Yes.

Daniel: It a boy or a girl? (all up in my personal space)

Me: It's a boy.

Daniel: What his name is?

Me: Luke.

Daniel: No, what his name is? It Jones? (that's the last name of one of his brothers)

Me: No, honey. His name will be Luke Benson. I'm Mrs. Benson. My baby will be Luke Benson.

Daniel: Oh. (looks completely perplexed) You got a kid at home?

Me: Yes.

Daniel: What it be?

Me: What you do mean, what is it? Do I have a little girl or a little boy?

Daniel: got a boy or a girl at home?

Me: Daniel, I've got a daughter at home. She's almost 5 just like you are already 5.

Daniel: What her name is?

Me: Meryt.

Daniel: No, no. What her name is?

Me: Honey, her name is Meryt. Meryt is the name of my little girl.

Daniel: What her OTHER name is?

Me: Daniel, you really need to ask me correctly like this, "What is her name?" Her name is Meryt Benson. I'm Mrs. Benson. Our baby boy is Luke Benson and my daughter is Meryt Benson.

Daniel: (completely perplexed by this) You got a man at home, too?

Me: Yes. He's my husband. That's when a man and a lady are married to each other. The man is the husband and the lady is the wife. My husband's name is Mr. ______.

Daniel: What his OTHER name?

Me: Well, you'll call him Mr. H, like all the other children, but his name is H---- Benson.

Daniel: You ALL got the name Benson?!

Me: (losing all control I've had during this entire conversation and flat out laughing at this point) Yes, precious. We've ALL got the name Benson. Mrs. Benson. Luke Benson. Meryt Benson. Mr. H Benson. We're all Benson.

Daniel: (walking away) How about that...


Carrie said...

That is funny!!! and very revealing of the home life (so a little sad) He is so lucky to have you for a teacher this year!!!! I don't think you ever make your stories too long either so keep 'em coming. Big hugs to everyone! I can't wait to see pics of you and the family holding Luke.

Andi said...

HILARIOUS! I literally laughed out loud! REALLY LOUD. I know I should feel sorry for him, but I can only imagine I would have had this SAME conversation had I ever shown up to work pregnant during ANY of my 16 years as a teacher. OH MY GOODNESS. Nat, thank you for helping me laugh in spite of SO much- sheer exhaustion, brain dead stupor, and physical body pain like I've been hit by a truck. The first week of school is always HELL. SO, thanks for that outrageously funny story.

Kyla said...

Hahaha!! Cute story!

Arizaphale said...

I LOVE it! Thanks for that laugh, my colleague and I needed it here on a Friday afternoon!!!