M has three freckles on her face.
Completely irrelevant. I know.
As I stare into the face of this scary (for me) surgery, I'm focusing on the most irrelevant things.
Three freckles on her face.
Where to spend the night post op.
How to decorate her wagon (aka The Queen-Mobile).
I'm scared to ask what this "head in the sand" mentality says about me.
Oh, and I'm completely obsessed with my mother's colonoscopy tomorrow. They live three hours away. My mind is racing, "Should I be there? Do they need me? Should I pack a bag in case I need to go quickly?" Irrelevant!!!! My dad is perfectly capable of handling this. My mother is amazing and will handle this with grace and dignity, the way she handles everything.
Did I mention M has three freckles on her face? One between her lip and her left nostril. One above her left eye brow. One near her left ear.
I sure would appreciate your prayers right now. I'm having a hard, hard, hard time letting go of this and RELYING on The One Who is in Control. He is stronger and bigger than my worry, but I can't quite seem to go to Him. I'm holding on to this real tight right now, clutching it to my chest.